Sin... A discussion with a mouse

A tumid thing to talk about because who is without it... Aye! The first sentence is a statement, no intentions whatsoever, hidden or otherwise, to make it interrogative in a manner or so implicitly as with the subject itself. Now, straight to the discussion with a clown, or a mouse, not sure eh ... I am sorry he seems disfigured that I cannot make up what form he is taking, albeit I can see him standing in front of me. Weird isn't it? I am affirmative into saying that I am not intoxicated, nauseous or suffering from any maladie that could hinder my mind from functioning with logic. I can assure you that I am prudent and this article I owe to the clown or the mouse or whatever he is, though I need prodding to write this discussion (pray, hear me that it was not a discussion, as it appears to me for it was just him who's babbling..) down. For whatever reason he made this discussion, I honestly cannot fathom .

He said (holding the Bible ...) under Proverbs 6:16-19, it is stated that "These six things doth the Lord hate:yea, seven are an abomination unto him.." Here it is as enumerated:
= (17) A proud look
= a lying tongue
= and hands that shed innocent blood
=(18) A heart that deviseth wicked imaginations
= feet that be swift in running to mischief
= (19) A false witness that speaketh lies,
= and he that soweth discord among brethren.

He further added that there is no where in the Bible where the traditional deadly "seven sins' are located or listed, but a given that they are all condemned in various parts along with several others. The only one clear thing in the Bible is that there is only one cardinal sin, an act that disobeys God's law that separates man from a perfect God, placing him in need of redemption and salvation. In another article by Dante Alighieri, basing his thoughts on St. Thomas Aquinas dissertation (the mouse or clown does not want to name the literature where this so-called dissertation is included...), hubris or vanity (pride) is considered as the most serious of the seven deadly sins. The need to feel more important than the others. Dante's definition for pride is stated as "love of self perverted to hatred and contempt for one's neighbor."

The clown ... er ... mouse, whatsoever, further now into the discussion cited Bishop Gianfranco Girotti's (head of the Apostolic Penitentiary of the Vatican..) seven modern sins : environmental pollution, obscene wealth, infliction of poverty, drug trafficking, morally debatable experiments, and the violation of the fundamental rights of human nature. There is also a new set of sins in the book of Galatians (5:21 of the New Testament): envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like, as I have told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. The list of the so-called deadly sins is getting longer and longer. I am getting wheezy now.

Whoah...Stop, please hold your thoughts, I told the mouse .. or the clown, whatever.... just what are you trying to insinuate? I asked him ...

He just smiled and blurted a question (instead of an answer) ... Who proposes the criteria of sin? ... I said people.
He laughed ... And to who do you think these criteria are imposed on? ... I said on people...

Then he gave me a toothy grin ... He has become more like a clown now that he is grinning... He stood up laughing and took his leave... His laugh echoing along the walls wherein landscape paintings hang.

haunted people ....

She seemed to be suspended in eerie silence. All walled up in a world that is vast yet empty... Walls she herself made. Hoping to drown the loud crack of lighting outside and rain. It's just so dark ... so dark.

She ran away when she was just 14. Left a home that is cold and has never been like a home to her. Lived in the city and tried her best to live the life she wanted. Living on money sent by an aunt. She made ends meet by skipping meals and walking from a rented place to her school. She went to college and finished her major. Made friends and loved a guy. Now she can't even remember her mom's face...

She has a sister... biologically they were sisters ... but then, that's just it. She has been ranting about what her sister achieved... A sister who is a Philippine Military Academy graduate and now a Philippine Naval officer. Here I am sitting in front of her, one she considers a friend but it appears like she cannot see me. Her lips are moving just as fast as her thoughts... Ranting ... Oblivious of a presence. Claiming the space and the air... I can feel her anger... The air is starting to get bitter. "I can actually leave anybody now including Dan, I have no hesitations. I don't want anybody on my way when I want something ... I am tired of taking care of people ... ". Her words are cold. Her chest heaving like she just ran ...

As I leave my workstation that day, I realized that no matter how you ran away from your past, it always has a way of catching up with you. She may think that she left her past but she took it with her. Her anger and the bitterness are obviously from her past ...

It's the worst case scenario of someone who's trying to escape from the past. It eventually consumes the person and ends up empty. The past just hovers around and does not go away ... ever.

I just hope that she wakes up from her sleep... Now that she is talking to her sister for the first time in 15 years.

Your Laughter ...

Just want to share this moving poem by Pablo Neruda ...

Your Laughter

Take bread away from me, if you wish,
take air away, but
do not take from me your laughter.

Do not take away the rose,
the lance flower that you pluck,
the water that suddenly
bursts forth in joy,
the sudden wave
of silver born in you.

My struggle is harsh and I come back
with eyes tired
at times from having seen
the unchanging earth,
but when your laughter enters
it rises to the sky seeking me
and it opens for me all
the doors of life.

My love, in the darkest
hour your laughter
opens, and if suddenly
you see my blood staining
the stones of the street,
laugh, because your laughter
will be for my hands
like a fresh sword.

Next to the sea in the autumn,
your laughter must raise
its foamy cascade,
and in the spring, love,
I want your laughter like
the flower I was waiting for,
the blue flower, the rose
of my echoing country.

Laugh at the night,
at the day, at the moon,
laugh at the twisted
streets of the island,
laugh at this clumsy
boy who loves you,
but when I open
my eyes and close them,
when my steps go,
when my steps return,
deny me bread, air,
light, spring,
but never your laughter
for I would die.

Pablo Neruda

Grateful ...

1. For the husband who snores all night, because he is at home asleep with me and not with someone else.

2. For my teenage daughter who is complaining about doing dishes because that means she is at home & not on the streets.

3. For the taxes that I pay because it means that I am employed.

4. For the mess to clean after a party because it means that I have been surrounded by friends.

5. For the clothes that fit a little too tight because it means I have enough to eat.

6. For my shadow that watches me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.

7. For a floor that needs mopping, and windows that need cleaning because it means I have a home.

8. For all the complaining I hear about the government because it means that we have freedom of speech.

9. For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking and that I have been blessed with transportation.

10. For the noise I have to bear from my neighbors because it means that I can hear.

11. For the pile of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear.

12. For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been capable of working hard.

13. For the arguments because it means that I can still think.

14. For the times that I get to wait for someone because it means that I am not late.

14. For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I am alive.

======

Thanks to Van for sharing ...

People I miss ...

Friends that I miss (in no particular order) ...

Laarni B.
- miss her smile that reminds me of Cameron Diaz
- she laughs hard and sleeps hard...
- the girl in the barkada that has the most suitors

Maricris C.
- I miss her chinky eyes na mawala once she smiles or laughs
- I like looking at her hair, dili xa black kau. It was brown and fine.

Alma A.
- My bestfriend in the whole wide world!
- I really laugh hard whenever I'm with this girl. She is very funny that you'd end up with a painful stomach and cheeks.
- I miss seeing her eat like a guy. I think she has compartments in her stomach, just like a cow's stomach.
- I miss eating ice cream with her. We eat a pint of ice cream in one sitting just for kicks. Wala lang trip lang gud... hehehe
- Afflicted with "autism" just like me...
- this girl introduced me to Shakira and Bond (the violin girls quartet)

Marilie H.
- I miss her kakikayan, the bangles and the bangs.
- I miss her novels. Romance and Nancy Drew novels which I totally love.

Bernice H.
- I miss her feisty mouth. She may have a frail body but mataray ning bayhana. She fights for me even if she is smaller than me ...

Marty L.
- My track buddy who became my mentor in the field.

Macy J.
- My personal shrink. She helps me become a bit more sane.

Abigail V.
- First Tagalog person I understood. It's not I don't understand Tagalog, I just don't like hearing it kay murag hambug sya ug dating.
- First person who called me BALIW. But loves me nonetheless.

Abby G.
- Miss our Beverly Hills 90210 exchange of views. I still have the card you gave me for my birthday, can't remember though where I put it.. hehehe

Polding S.
- One of my bestfriends.. Miss your lugaw with tinap-an flakes. But guess he doesn't like me the way I am because I haven't heard of him for 3 years now.Hmmpft!

Victor T.
- Miss this guy's gross jokes. I got my pranks from him.

Pagay B.
- Miss this guy's antics with girls, can't help but smile because even if he already looks stupid he'll hold his ground for as long as he can.

Malee
- Miss my buddy... Babaero but sincere.
- Daghan syag wallet and each wallet has a picture of a girl. He makes sure that he brings the right wallet when he goes out to dates... hehehe.

Beth R.
- Malee's great love.
- Love her cooking, specially her adobo.
- Mother to 3 wonderful kids.

Jundy
- My adopted brother
- Weakness is girls
- First guy I know who gets teary eyed whenever he sees his wife. He gets teary eyed daw because he cannot believe that he is the husband of this wonderful girl. CHAR!

Jimmy L.
- Thank you for catching me from that very high drop bro.
- I miss your contagious laughter and the coffee.
- I miss your punches on my sides too.


Wherever you may be guys (and gals), you still cross my mind and I just hope that we can get to meet sometime and do the things that we love doing.

Delicadeza

Got to work almost late today and was racing my ugly butt down the floor to get to my workstation fast.I felt good because I was able to clock in at exactly 12noon.I opened my tools and since cannot open this one tool again, I changed my gateway.

I was already settled on my cube,when a personal message came up. Hmm ... Since when did Cindy send me a personal message? Di ba she is in the States? There could be something wrong ... "Seth, musta? Haven't heard from you in such a long time..." The cursor was flashing. Told her I'm doing good but asked her if she is in the U.S. She said yes. She said that they are graduating from culinary school this fall and might come back to Tacloban for a quick vacation on November or December...

Cindy is a close friend of Andi. They go to gym together, play bowling together, exchange cars ...

She asked why have I distanced myself from Andi which appears like waray pa ko ka-get over. I found the question too straightforward but nonetheless good because I can clarify myself and come out clean.Told her ka-get over naman ko. I just have so much respect to the person I am involved with now, it's just pure delicadeza.

It's just sad that not too many people have that...

Grumpy me ...

I didn't actually understand what I felt. I just wanted something and it turned out I am being selfish.

These are one of the few times that I hate myself... for being so touchy... for being so clingy... for being so tactless ...

for being so inconsiderate...

Yeah.. I am ashamed of myself. The tears you shed became my slap and knew instantly that I ruined your morning. It should have been a very gorgeous morning...

but I ruined it.

For that, I am sorry.

Of Seasons ...

As I was clearing my files, i came across this picture of a tree. The picture looks so sad. On the middle of a wide green space, it's the only thing that stands. It has been witness to the passing of seasons. Though it may appear withered and slowly living it's last days, I think it's life has not been sad and solitary. The sky, the sun and the ground are there to give the tree it's needs ... So can I totally say that it lived it's life with resignation and contentment?

Hope you heard the story about the phoenix.

Faith Hill - Breathe (Video)

feel good video ...

posting this song as it was requested ...



I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way
I watch the sunlight dance across your face
And i've never been this swept away
All my thoughts just seem to settle on the breeze
When i'm lying wrapped up in your arms
The whole world just fades away
The only thing I hear
Is the beating of your heart

CHORUS:
Cause I can feel you breathe
It's washing over me
And suddenly i'm melting into you
There's nothing left to prove
Baby, all we need is just to be
Caught up in the touch
Slow and steady rush
Baby, isn't that the way that love's suppose to be
I can feel you breathe

In a way I know my heart is waking up
As all the walls come tumbling down
Closer than i've ever felt before
And I know, and you know
There's no need for words right now

CHORUS:

I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way...

Walk me home ...

Nice sunset eh? Yes ... But you'd appreciate the place more during the day. To life, I think you know what I mean...

I had been raring to go home since I left my town last January of this year ... I want to go back home not because I need to unwind and catch up with the latest news in our place, but to have a date with my doctor ... I am scared, yes. But not long enough the sun will shine through these clouds and I will be unburdened.



And finally my walk home ... I hope. After being scared, after being anxious, I will find my way home. Please tarry awhile and walk me home.

==========

Thanks to Mark Dominic for the photos....
Photos: Surf Camp in Calicoan Island

On 8 ...

According to an article in Wikipedia, the word for "eight" in Chinese (Pinyin: bā) sounds similar to the word which means "prosper" or "wealth" (发 - short for "发财", Pinyin: fā). In regional dialects the words for "eight" and "fortune" are also similar, eg Cantonese "baat" and "faat".

There is also a resemblance between two digits, "88", and the shuang xi ('double joy'), a popular decorative design composed of two stylized characters 喜 (xi, 'joy', 'happiness')

Positive: Materialism, strength, tenacious, capacity for focused and sustained effort.

Negative: Ruthless, no thought for others, guilt ridden, bad luck.

In Chinese numerology, eight is the number of material success or failure. The number of Karma. Eight has to work hard, and often needs to do the same thing over before success is achieved. The Eight is a strong number, with the will, focus and drive to achieve its goals.Expressing its feelings doesn't come easy to the Eight, and it needs to avoid ill-health brought on by stress. Eight is a fine number, and often misunderstood by others less powerful than itself.
In Greek numerology, the number 8 represents power and sacrifice.

============

My abuelo told me that eight is an auspicious number since it's a number whose lines don't end, no cuts anywhere to end it. It's almost resembling a cycle, it goes up and it goes down and goes up again. But nonetheless he considers it lucky (it represents power, fortune and prosperity). But let's get real first... Power, fortune and prosperity? Nah! I'm not wishing much... Maybe a little wealth and health will be good enough.

Let's be more personal here .... hehehe

Reaching eight was never easy. There had been a lot of creased edges that had been ironed out, though some of those creases are still there. And I think no matter how hard we iron out those wrinkled edges, they're going to stay there to add flavor to the face of the quilt. The patches on this quilt has different colors, making sure that it serves the purpose of the quilt (which is to provide warmth) and also compliment the personality of the users.

Expressing feelings was not that hard. Though, there was always reserve in the way these feelings were passed through, subdued but present. There's tenacity even on the down low like gold beaten to airy thinness.

Looking back, it has been a crazy journey in making this quilt. It has been eight now. A lot more to go, more colors and more days to make this quilt worth having. We got cut only to be sewn again. It's not just us who made this quilt. Time helped us. Friends (errrr... and those who are not) did their share too. They deserve the warmest "thank you".

I guess, nous avons la chance en effet. Eight opens up the gate to nine and ten and so on and so forth. I'll hang on to this quilt now since I do not know what will happen in the future. One thing is sure, this quilt will warm my heart for years and years transcending eight.

The Dream ...

I admit, the place is really pretty. The sand is so fine that it feels like you are walking on velvet. I can feel the waves' soft movements, constantly lapping on my calves. The sun is slowly going down the horizon and the sky is turning hazy red and tangerine. Where could he be? Less people are on the beach now, mostly just combing the shoreline to unload their worries, bending occasionally to pick up something on the sand that they fancy... Maybe I should think less too.. I can feel the cold winds now, blowing my hair away from my face. The chill, something unwanted, but somehow I want more of it.

Where could he be? I have been sitting on this spot for 3 hours now, with someone to keep me company, his hands on my knees, talking, being silly, empty talk, unsure answers to open ended questions, no more questions please, uh-oh, he shot another one, cannot find an answer, my mind, it's floating somewhere ... somewhere else, it's with him. Wind, can you do me a favor?... Can you please carry me to him, wherever he may be ... Then I felt a finger tracing my arm then a saw a smile... Sorry, I need to go.

I struggled up the dunes with no sure footing, with his hand on my hips, then there you are staring at me, with that betrayed look on your face... I felt a hand hit me flat on my cheek, I spat but I can still taste my blood... It is not what you think it is... Eyes, open.. Slit eyed ... A bit dark ... Chest heaving, I'm losing ....No, no. Losing you, no! ... My hand scanned for something to hold ... Yeah, my bed ... Yeah, a dream... Breathe hard, settle... breathe easy now ...

Eyes slowly adapting to the dimness of the room, a form beside me, his head on my chest ... A familiar scent. O God, I thought I lost you.. You opened up your eyes and hugged me closer. You stared at something I cannot see, then you looked at me straight ... You said you just had a dream, in your dream you broke up with me ... Saw me with someone on the pool, careless, uncaring, not mindful ... You said you were hurt ... You said you were shamed ... You were still saying something when I touched your cheek to pull your head closer, but I felt water trickling down my palm ... Tears ...

Tears for my blood ... and the dreams .. we shared almost the same dream ... a trick! Or is it? I don't even care ... I think you know.

INSTALLING A HUSBAND ... From Phil

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in the flower and jewelry applications,which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail..

What can I do?

Signed, Desperate


========


Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: 'I Thought You Loved Me.exe' and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

About being YOU... About being ME

Adlai Stevenson:

I think that one of our most important tasks is to convince others that there's nothing to fear in difference; that difference, in fact, is one of the healthiest and most invigorating of human characteristics without which life would become meaningless. Here lies the power of the liberal way: not in making the whole world Unitarian [Universalist], but in helping ourselves and others to see some of the possibilities inherent in viewpoints other than one's own; in encouraging the free interchange of ideas; in welcoming fresh approaches to the problems of life; in urging the fullest, most vigorous use of critical self-examination.

I always find it funny when a friend I haven't seen in such a long time will tell me I have changed. A smirk will just appear on my face and tell them it's not true. I'm the same person. Just got fat... hehehe.... I may be a bit different but that little kid who used to throw slippers into a can and who had no hair until she turned 3 years old, is still the same kid.... Er... not a kid anymore but I assure you, I am still who I used to be.

I bumped into a friend who I haven't seen in a long while. We were all smiles and set a date because we have a lot of catching up to do. We were both eager to patch up the gap between us. Over dinner, she was looking at me like I had 3 heads. To be honest, we did not like each other to start with (we were high school freshmen when we first met). We talked about a lot of things over dinner (an early dinner), mostly about how things went through in high school and college, sharing laughs and old anecdotes about our teachers and classmates. Old issues resurfaced and here we are, hating each other over again. We lost the smiles on our faces and the air became tensed. She hated me for being laid back. I hated her for being so stiff. She hated me for being tolerant (she said tolerant people are prone to abuse). I hated her for being a skeptic. The meeting ended sour. She hated me for being this and that. I hated her for comparing me to her. What's written should not just be black and white. Everything everyone sees and feels have reasons. I cannot be you and you can't be me and that's it. And it's unnecessary for someone to just walk away because there is this vast facade between us that does not fit the picture (or for her, does not fit her standards for a misc en scene).

Everyone should take pride in his/her own being different. Variety is never boring. What's important is self-examination. You have to be your own critic and not of others because people lead lives, their own lives that is. One way or another, you are going to get tired of them not behaving the way you want them to and in the process get frustrated and walk out. Question is, did you get something out of it?

How about let's just co-exist? I will see things around you and you'll tell me what you see around me... That way, I'm getting something and so are you. You and me coexisting. We may not be the picture but we are part of the picture. Our friendship can be very beautiful if we just apply understanding, compassion and introspection on it. Pure friendship is not that complicated if you'll just let it be.

"Long Calls and Long Distance "

As I was browsing through a friend's blog, I stumbled into something interesting,though the title was not that catchy (LONG DISTANCE LOVE AFFAIR),and it's overused. I've had a long distance relationship once, (the person was away for 2 months) but I admit that it is not actually enough to test what we have because we were just barely into our second month. I am sure about what I feel, but I was not so sure if I can deal with the distance. Honestly, I am a touchy person. I want to feel the other person inside my arms and I draw comfort from that. I'll just quote her blog as we try to 'disect' her points.

A quote from the blog:

...... Today, we hardly have any excuse not to be able to communicate, what with all the unlimited texting and unlimited phone calls and all the sorts available in the telecommunications business. In short, just as long distance communication isn't as costly as before compared to the cheap means of communicating now, long distance relationships aren't as impossible to keep as compared before.
So why is it that most long distance relationships still doesn't work?

All means of communication now has become cheaper, yes. It's not good to blame the distance as the culprit for a failed relationship. So if a long distance relationship is not working, I'd blame the persons involved. Even under tight circumstances, if the persons involved in that relationship, are willing to work, they believe and make things happen according to how they want it to be, then everything will be ok. Now, I'm not saying that everything will be "smooth-ok". There will be times that sacrifices are necessary and even if you give up something, it will not give you the results that you were expecting. I've heard friends say that it's tiring to be keeping up with the distance because you have to make phone calls, write letters (pwede sad email, hehehe...) and I admit that you do have to spend your time, effort and money to close out the distance. And sometimes, your phone conversations don't end well (you fought over something) , or dugay abot imong snail mail (snail lagi so madugay jud na...) or imong email was redirected back to the sender. Frustrating, isn't it?

Quote na sad (some lines are edited to paraphase points):

..... lack of communication was the primary factor why these (sic...long distance relationship) kinds of relationships fall apart. We still hear lots of troubled hearts looking for answers why they lost their love. Some are asking why the person they loved the most don't love them anymore and still others ask why they are beginning to fall for someone else.Doesn't this make us realize that love is not just a matter of being able to communicate after all? We are still experiencing the same problems now as we did before, thinking that the barrier in the communication process was the main culprit in broken relationships.

So, let's establish as part of the argument that the lack of communication (not the distance) is the primary factor why long distance relationships fail. Hmmm... Yes, you know that you are on the other island, that a body of water (hmm... duh... island lagi) is between you and you can really feel the weight of his/her abscence and then you feel like your head is spinning and your stomach is starting to get upset (over na ni.. OA). How about if you just think of how things were when you were together? Just think of how her pinches hurt or how his underarm stinks ... hehehe... kidding. Anyway, maybe he/she left you something,say, hmm.. like accesories, a ballpen perhaps, an old sticky note. It's something you can touch. You were in his/her mind when he/she gave it, so it's like giving a part of oneself. Be happy (and contented) with what you have. Don't look at the things that you don't have because sakit lang sa buot.

Personally, I have to learn how to be contented with what I have too, letters niya and some pictures. I heard one friend say may rason kun kayano hiya mabalik ha iya hometown (there is a reason daw)... Yeah, the reason is that I need to be taught how to be happy with just my memories, the memories that I've made with the other person. My memories became my food, it fed my hunger. My memories also became my air, it keeps be breathing. My memories became my motivation in waking up and make some more memories. It was hard at first but it became natural eventually, and before I know it, we were talking hours (3-4 hours) on the phone.It also holds true with your memories of home, my memories of home is what makes me grounded, me being me. My memories are my sanctuary. It's where I cower just in case things start to fall apart (luckily we're still together).

My point is, to erase the distance, for you to feel that the other person is real, you'll have to believe in what you feel, breathe it and feel it. Now, you will not see the distance anymore, and time, effort and money will not matter . Everything has become natural and you'll always find a way.

Another quote from the blog (na naman):

....... I figured out the hard part is searching for the one person who would actually believe that you two can make it and respect you for your views. It's amazing how true love changes the perspective of a person. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not really one to say it with a period much more an exclamation point at the end of this sentence but I am quite sure I have had my share of long distance relationships and somehow I've figured out how it might just work.So how is it possible for long distance relationships to work if only one of the parties believe in it? It takes two to tango as the old saying goes.

Good point! Both parties should believe that you can make it, and both should be willing to work on it, though both of you stand on opposite extremes (but still love each other all the more for it... according to Jenny). Effort is needed to keep the line of communication between you open, constant effort that is. If everything for you has become natural, you will not see the effort you did. I'm just so lucky enough that I have found someone who believed in me and willing to make things work.

Now, back to my other world. :)